Fear of the Dark — How to Talk to Your Child and Help Them Overcome It

A child's fear of the dark is perfectly normal. Around the ages of 3–8, children develop vivid imaginations — they start understanding the world more deeply but can't yet separate fantasy from reality. Darkness becomes a space where "the unknown" hides, and that can feel truly frightening.

Here's how to help your child feel safe without reinforcing the fear.

🌙 1. Understand — Fear of the dark is normal

Your child isn't pretending. In the dark, vision is limited and the brain fills in the gaps with imagination.
The most important thing — don't dismiss or mock their feelings.

Instead of:

"Don't be silly, there's nothing there!"

Try saying:

"I understand you feel scared when it's dark. That's okay. Sometimes I feel like that too."

🕯️ 2. Create a sense of safety

• Nightlight – a soft glow helps your child orient in the room.

• Favorite toy or blanket – something familiar brings comfort.

• Slightly open door – connection with parents feels reassuring.

• Soft background sound – quiet music or white noise helps focus on safety, not silence.

💬 3. Talk about darkness during the day

When it's light and your child feels calm, explore the topic together:

• "What happens when we turn off the light?"

• "Does the room disappear?"

• Use a flashlight to "light up the dark" and show that nothing scary is hiding there.

The goal is to make darkness familiar, not mysterious.

🛏️ 4. Evening routine brings calm

Children feel safe when life is predictable.
A simple bedtime routine helps:

1. Warm bath

2. Storytime

3. Lights dimmed

4. Hug and goodnight ritual

Predictability gives them control — and fear fades.

❤️ 5. Be present, not perfect

If your child wakes up scared at night, don't get frustrated. Sit next to them and calmly say:

"I'm here. You're safe."

Children overcome fear when safety comes from your presence, not from light.

🌟 6. When fear becomes intense

If fear of the dark causes panic, bedtime refusal, or daily distress, consider:

• Talking with a child psychologist

• Doing relaxation or breathing games

• Drawing "the fear" together and shining a light on it

🌈 In conclusion

Fear of the dark fades when a child learns to trust their environment — their home, their bed, and you.
Patience, empathy, and gentle reassurance will turn bedtime into a calm and safe ritual.

💡 Tip for parents:
A Montessori wooden bed can help your child feel more independent and secure — being able to climb in and out freely builds confidence, even when the lights go out.